I am a lover. I enjoy the quiet moments where he and I are just being. Our breaths are in sync and our minds are in tune. I like to express my love to mine by telling him how great he is and by making myself available to him and filling him up on my abundant energy. I love how I’d like to be loved but unfortunately life has a way of letting me know that it really isn’t about me (can you believe that?). Of course if I love how I’d like to be loved then in return he loves how he wants to be loved. Sounds fine and dandy right? Well it’s great unless you both do not love the same way. Then the conflict arises because if he’s not supporting me how I’d like to be supported and if he’s not telling me that I can conquer the world and if he’s not nourishing my spirit and feeding my soul then I don’t feel the love that I need. Now hold on, don’t start saying to yourself “Marie, you are too picky, too demanding, you require too much”. There is some truth to what I’m saying. It’s called 5 Love Languages. According to Dr. Gary Chapman, there are 5 love languages. We all express our love in different ways, and how we love others is often how we want to be loved in return. The 5 languages are quality time, physical touch, words of affirmation, acts of service and receiving gifts. Check out the website for more information on each love language and take a quiz to find out which love language you speak. Even before taking the quiz, I was sure that my primary language was words of affirmation. I need to hear that I am doing well, that I’m enough, that I’m capable, loveable and that it may hurt now, but I will get through it. That is how I know you’re in my corner and that I am loved. I also knew that it’s important and vital (in all of my relationships) for me to spend quality time with my partner. I’m a bit of a know it all fyi. Learning about the 5 love languages was such a huge breakthrough for me. Everything clicked, and I got a better understanding of my previous relationships. Why we didn’t work out, what I needed to do to become a better me and what I needed to let go of. So run, don’t walk to your nearest computer and read about the love languages, take the quiz and talk to your partner and hopefully things will make more sense for you. I’ve been telling everyone and their supervisor about the 5 love languages.
Which love language do you think you speak?